|
IT WIS COMIN’ NEAR THE
TIME FOR THE OBAN YACHT CLUB ANNUAL BALL. THAT YEAR MY FATHER WAS TO BE
MADE AN HONOURARY MEMBER FOR HIS SERVICES OWER THE YEARS TAE THE CLUB.
ON A SETERDAY EFTERNEEN HE WID TAK THE ALLIANCE OOT INTAE THE BAY AND
SHE WID BE USED AS THE STARTER BOAT FOR A’ THE RACES.
JOHN MAXWELL A LOCAL ELECTRICIAN FA WIS PRESIDENT O’ THE CLUB HAD ASKED
HIM TAE COME ALONG TAE THE BALL AS HIS PRESENTATION WIS TAE BE THE
HIGHLIGHT O’ THE EVENING. TELL YER CREW TAE COME ALONG AS WEEL HE TELT
MY FATHER, WHO ON HEARING THIS WIS NAE TOO KEEN ON THE IDEA BUT DIDNA
LIKE TAE SAY ONYTHIN’.
THE BIG DAY ARRIVED AND THAT NICHT HE GOT A’ DRESSED UP AND WENT UP TAE
THE COLUMBA HOTEL FAR THE DO WIS BEEIN’ HELD. HE HIDNA SAID ONYTHIN’ TAE
THE CREW AS HE KENT FIT LIKE THEY WERE, THEY WID TURN IT INTAE A
SHAMBLES.
THE PRESIDENT WINNERIN’ FAR THE CREW WERE DECIDED TAE GO DOON TAE THE
BOAT AND INVITE THEM UP FOR A DRINK. LITTLE DID HE KNOW FIT HE WIS
LETTIN’ HIMSELF IN FOR, BUT HE WIS SEEN TAE FIND OOT.
TOM HAD JIST COME OOT O’ THE ENGINE ROOM EFTER CHINGIN’ THE ILE IN THE
ENGINE. ON HEARING THE REQUEST TAE GO UP TAE THE HOTEL HE DIDNA WASTE
NAE TIME AND WENT THE WYE HE WIS, HAUNS COVERED IN ILE AND BLACK AS THE
ROAD AS USUAL. APPEARANCE DIDNA METTER TAE TOM FIN THERE WIS FREE DRINK
ON THE GO.
TOM MADE HIS ENTRANCE IN THE HOTEL DOOR AND THE LOOK O’ CONSTERNATION ON
THE ASSEMBLED DIGNITARIES WIS A SICHT TAE BEHOLD AS HE SIDLED UP TAE THE
BAR AND QUICKLY DOWNED A FEW PINTS AND A PUCKLE NIPPIES. TURNIN’ ROON
TAE FACE THE CROWD ALL DRESSED UP FOR THE OCCASION, LADIES IN THEIR
BALLGOWNS, GENTLEMEN IN THEIR EVENING SUITS AND BOW TIES, HE SPOTTED MY
FATHER TALKIN’ TAE THE PRESIDENT AND HIS WIFE. TOM THOCHT TAE HIMSEL’
I’LL AWA OWER AND THANK HIM FOR THE INVITATION, SO HE STAGGERED OWER TAE
JINE THE COMPANY. MRS.MAXWELL WIS LOOKING RESPLENDENT IN HER NEW
BACKLESS GOON BOCHT FOR THE OCCASION. SHE WIS COMPLETELY UNAWARE OF THE
IMPENDING DISASTER THAT WIS ABOOT TAE BEFALL ON HER.
TOM APPROACHED HIS UNSUSPECTING VICTIM AND CLAPPED HER ON THE BACK WITH
THE GREETIN’, “HOO YE DOOIN’ MRS MAXWELL?”. QUICKLY TURNIN’ ROON SHE
TOOK ONE LOOK AT TOM, WHICH WIS MAIR THAN ENOUGH, (HE WIS NAE ILE PENTIN
AT THE BEST O’ TIMES).HURRIEDLY MAKING HER EXCUSES TO MY FATHER THAT SHE
WOULD HAVE TAE MINGLE WITH THE GATHERING HER BEIN’ THE PRESIDENTS WIFE
SHE QUICKLY WALKED AWAY. FIN SHE TURNED HER BACK THERE WIS TOM’S GREAT
BIG BLACK HANDPRINT ON HER BACK. SEEIN’ FIT HAD HAPPENED MY FATHER NEAR
HID A FIT, ROOSHELIN TOM OOT THE DOOR AND BACK TAE THE BOAT. ”I KENT
SOMETHIN’ WIS BOUND TAE HAPPEN”. HIS EARLIER FEARS HAD BEEN REALISED, “I
CANNA TAK YE NAE WYE” HE SAID TAE A MUCH AMUSED BUT NON APOLOGETIC
ENGINEER. |
