1944-1949
Banknock Village – ‘Tanner Ba’ Playin’ an’ a Cuv’
As my reading
ability, even as a eight year old, was not quite up to making too much
sense of our household’s daily newspaper, ‘The Glasgow Herald’, I
cannot say that my first incursions into competitive sport were much
encouraged by that medium. However, as I was a keen listener to what
my parents had to say about almost anything, and because they
willingly taught me how fiddle with our ancient wireless to make it
work on the ‘Scottish Home Service’ and the UK-wide ‘Light Programme’,
I had relatively rich sources to stimulate my sporting imagination -
mostly football then - and otherwise, especially, ‘Dick Barton –
Special Agent’ and ‘Auntie’ Kathleen Garscadden’s ‘Children’s Hour’!
Through week-days,
my dad was a discriminating wireless listener – he would sit down in
his comfy armchair after tea-time to hear the six o’clock news and was
invariably sound asleep not long after the headlines! It never ceased
to amaze me at that time that he would waken up about twenty minutes
later as fresh as paint, and say, with a sheepish smile, ‘Just having
my forty winks.’ Then, if it was spring or summer, he would be up and
away out to the garden, or else be off to any committee meeting or
social function that seemed to programme his after-school daily life
of expected community service.
Saturdays were
different though, and we could expect him to be around from breakfast
until bedtime then. Thus, on Saturday afternoons together, we would
listen to the second-half of whatever ‘A’ Division or Scottish Cup or
Home International Football match the Home Service might be covering.
The roar of the crowds, especially, ‘The Hampden Roar’, was amazing
and infectious. The commentators - I think the likes of Peter Thomson
even then - painted such vivid images of exciting football - ‘Geordie
Young thumps the ball up the park, ‘Torry Gillick slips it out to the
right’, ‘Willie Waddell has it now’ … ‘He’s crossing to Willie
Thornton’ …..’It’s a goal’! [crowd noise is immense]….. ‘and
Rangers go one up’ ! ……Or….. ‘Tanner Ba’ Charlie Tully is running
rings round the Rangers’ defence’ … ‘I don’t believe it, he’s just
walked it round Bobby Brown’ …. ‘Celtic have equalised’!
A year or so later,
cricket Test Matches competed for my attention…. ‘Ugh, the cricket,
again’, my mum would say without fail, but with a smile of contented
(I think!) resignation! But that’s another story!
Elizabeth, with
John wearing the Castings CC Cricket Cap
given to him in
1946/47 by his Uncle John Telfer
If the wireless was
a real blessing, there was a deal of frustration for me, as a seven
year old, in bringing such media stimulated passion for football into
reality. The boys in my dad’s Primary 4 and 5 were allocated the top
half of the school playground for football with a ‘tanner ba’ tennis
ball providing the means of action for their daily nominated ‘coak and
hen’ teams. They protected their territory so jealously that no
youngster from a lower class, despite his enthusiasm or potential
skill, could hope to gain admission to the elite competition. Thus
Robin Profit, my equally fitba’ daft pal next door in Bankier Road,
and I initially had to be content during school hours with the likes
of ‘moshie’ bools games or being sissies with the lassies and their
skipping ropes in the lower half of the playground.
Half the 1946
‘Elite’ Territory (now grassed)
with one
surviving ‘Goal-post’ Wall in 2004
However, after
school was a different matter because between us Robin and I had a
‘secret weapon’ in the form of a Size 5 leather ‘cuv’!
The first full
size ball ‘The Cuv’ arrives in 1946/47
The provision of
this hallowed article allowed us entry with great alacrity into
similarly arranged matches to the school ones on the adjacent waste
ground beside the Streetville council flats. And if things got a wee
bit tousy from the variety of ‘big-yins’ who would muscle into such
evening confrontations, we could always say, ‘It’s oor ba’ an’ we’re
goin’ hame’!
In such unfortunate
circumstances Robin and I resorted to interminable games of ‘heiders’
or ‘penalty shoot-outs’ down the gable-end driveway of his house where
gate and garage door providing handy and easily identifiable
goal-posts …. Until my dad, with genuine school-masterly perception,
noting our occasional problems as wee ones amidst the Streetville
crowd, as well as our admirable improvisations, offered us private
access to, and use of for ‘real’ football, the unkempt school-garden
ground lying between the schoolhouse and the school. But, it was only
for the two of us, which handicap, if it was such at our age, we were
only to glad to accept. Thus, ‘Bumpy Ibrox’ was born and apart from
hosting many other sports ‘events’ in due course, it was the ‘stadium’
which housed numerous one-a-side matches between ‘John or Robin’s
Rangers’ versus John or Robin’s Celtic or Hearts or Hibs or Falkirk or
whoever’. Toss of the coin of course decided who would get his
preferred team in any of these encounters, which seldom finished in
the regulation ninety minutes, but, particularly at the week-end,
could rage on (with numerous half-times for drinks, or interruptions
to mend the punctured bladder inside the ball) until either dusk or
parental shouts to come in out of the rain called for a final whistle
– which incidentally we always blew with due ceremony, unless
exceptionally when my sister Elizabeth had been prevailed upon by both
of us to referee because mutual agreement on fouls etc. had been
severely threatening our continuing friendship!
Half-time for
photographs
Saturday was the
exception – the wireless beckoned for both of us about four o’clock,
and thereafter, for all the years Robin and I were close friends, we
would get together in his house for the wireless ‘Sports Report’
results at half-past five, his mum’s delicious high-tea and cream
cakes, then ‘Sportsreel’, then ‘The McFlannels’ until the start of
board-games time, with both his mum and dad taking full part, was
signalled by the sounds of ‘Kate Dalrymple’ introducing ‘Scottish
Country Dance Music’. Bless them all, especially the Profits, but not
forgetting Marjorie Dalziel (aka Mrs McCotton) with whom I had the
pleasure later on in life to work alongside as stage manager in
Gargunnock Amateur Dramatic Club.