The acme of weakness is an accusing
conscience.
THE tongue lashing, to which we patiently
submitted, was severe but true, and I hope useful. She dwelt on
the sin of such cruelty, and then and there made us sit down and
write home (she would pay the mail) and acknowledge our faults,
making this step the condition of her receiving us into her
cottage to lodge. This lady on the following day made a
fruitless endeavor to dissuade us from a seafaring life, and
well she might; for out of a family of six, four sons and two
daughters, that insatiable element had swallowed up two, and
those her first-born boys. Her younger boys were also bound
apprentices to the sea, which to this loving soul proved a
fruitful source of grievous anxiety, that they likewise would in
all probability be buried in the deep. Such, indeed, is the
effect of the fascination held out by the rollicking Jack Tar on
the youth of the Northumberland coast, and the demands made upon
it, that it fully accounts for the disparity of the number of
males as compared with that of females, there appearing in the
census of that period five to one in favor of the latter. But it
must be borne in mind that this is the principal nursery of the
British navy, and where will you find such
sailors? Here you have the bone and muscle provoked into play by
an ingenious device in practice on this coast. Most seamen are
paid by the month. Here they are paid by the voyage. Pride and
profit are great incentives to speed. By this mode, the interest
of employer and employe are alike promoted, and the government
reaps the principal advantage. To return to our story: I am
ashamed to say the unanswerable eloquence of that estimable lady
was lost upon us, and seeing our resolution unshaken, she
determined to exercise her disinterested guardianship by placing
us under the guidance of a worthy man. Emanuel Walmsley was the
owner of four vessels, all hailing from North Shields, and
employed in carrying coal to London and elsewhere, in one of
which her two sons were apprenticed. Thither she carried us, and
were she our mother an introduction could not have been couched
in more tender language. Oh! the priceless value of motherly
love! The remembrance of that woman's disinterested kindness has
proved a balm to my mind for three-score years, and during the
season of my subsequent prosperity I resolved to visit and
tangibly thank her for past kindness, but on arriving at
Bowmaker's bank, North Shields, found the old cottage cold and
desolate, the family dispersed, and the venerable Samaritan
returned to dust just one week. With a heavy heart I returned to
London, regretting the baneful effect of a culpable
procrastination. Mr. Walmsley, a gentleman of three-score years,
attentively listened to the appeal of Mrs. Cookson, and kindly
complied with that lady's request to take us three boys into his
employment as apprentices, and arranged with her to board us
while his ships were at sea. The old Barbara, more commonly
called the old Meal Barrel, was due in ten days, and two of the
boys should ship in her, which two should be settled between
themselves. As for the third boy, she could not vouch for him as
being truthful. " In the meantime, send them down to my marine
warehouse, where we'll teach them to be half sailors before they
get to sea." This kind reception and arrangement proved
satisfactory to all parties concerned. Even the good old lady
seemed half reconciled to the prospects of her adopted charges,
and we, the pair of scapegraces, were overjoyed at our success.
The addition to our number failed to enhance our respectability.
He lied regarding his name. Still, he was employed. Twelve days'
experience in the good man's marine store, with the exception of
the usual bantering the poor Scotchmen have to stand when thrown
into contact with a low class of English, was mainly
comfortable, each day's petty annoyances being more than
compensated by the happy evenings spent in the bosom of Mrs.
Cookson's family. I may here remark that young as I was I did
marvel at the senseless jargon leveled at us on the part of the
foreman, who in other respects seemed intelligent, but who
uttered his broken English as if the most prickly part of a guid
auld Scotch thistle were stuck in his throat,
ignoring the use of the forceful rattling "r" in the
noble English language, and who pronounced the lower lights of
his own harbor "the law leets." But the man was intoxicated with
authority. He briefly lorded it over seven of his fellows, and
stands excused. Now comes a very painful scene in the drama. The
two Davies had been nearly a year boon companions, and had
together tasted of life's sweetness, and some of its bitters.
The hour approached that they must part. The old Barbara,
Captain Patterson, has thrown her ports open to receive another
load of black diamonds for London. One of the Davies must
forthwith report on board to undergo the usual trial trip
previous to binding. It fell to my lot to become cabin boy to
one of the most tyrannical of men. Painful it was to part from
the Cookson family, but the pain was softened in the prospect of
seeing them on my return. Not so in parting with the sonsy,
slow-going, taciturn, kind-hearted David Bonner, whom it never
has been my good fortune to see since; but I was subsequently
informed that he shipped on board the Harmony.
David Pierce, for that was the
third's real name, shipped with me on board the Barbara, and our
respective vessels keeping apart in their traffic deprived us of
the chance of meeting. From the comparatively cleanly occupation
of teazing oakum, etc., in the store, to the hold of the Meal
Barrel, trimming coal, was no very fascinating change, but
passive obedience is in the sailor, as in the soldier, an
important attribute. To-day I am in the hold ; to-morrow on the
gallant mast. Report says there is a four foot sea on Tynemouth
bar and expected to increase. Our hatches were battened and
decks half washed, when the order was given to cast off lines
and be off to sea. My first duty as a seaman was to assist to
unfurl the foretopgallant sail. Getting safely aloft, "and in
the act of obeying instructions, I was seized with all the
symptoms of an aggravated form of seasickness, which, totally
unfitted me for the duties devolving upon me, and before I could
reach the shrouds was compelled in my nausea, amidst the
heartless jeers of my shipmates, to cast up my accounts down
upon the deck below. Oh, the humiliating effect of that event!
Vain must be the attempt to describe my feelings. I could
neither eat nor sleep, consequently got daily worse and less
useful. Hitherto, my good health and buoyancy of spirits had
gained friends in the most trying circumstances. Now I found
that sickness and hopeless disappointment met with naught else
but kicks, cuffs and sneers from an unfeeling crew. In the
course of a few days, with a strong tide and southerly wind
against us, we cast anchor in Yarmouth Roads. While lying there,
the carpenter, a coarse fellow, taking umbrage at me for daring
to ask him to repeat something which I failed to understand,
struck me a blow on the side of my head, carrying my hat
overboard, which I thoughtlessly followed, being something of a
swimmer. Placing the hat where it belonged, on my head, I
essayed to reach the ship, but was suddenly struck with a sense
of danger on finding myself so far astern of her as to make it
appear impossible ever to reach her in my present weakness
against so strong a current, but hope revived when I perceived
the bustle on deck getting the boat out to save the drowning
boy. Nearly exhausted when picked up nearly a mile astern, I was
glad to see the carpenter foremost in his efforts to save. Of
course, the rope's end, the universal antidote for false steps
on the part of unthinking youth on board ship, had to be
applied. To allow my poor emaciated frame to escape the ordeal
would, in the eyes of Patterson, amount to an unpardonable
breach of discipline. This brutish scoundrel was a good seaman,
and was known to make in the slowest-sailing craft in the
Northumbrian coast trade the quickest runs. My testimony in this
case may be partial, and therefore deemed worthless, but I could
not help thinking while under the chastisement that the
proverbial caution, "To spare the rope's end would spoil the
sailor," was somewhat overstrained. Be that as it may, from that
moment I ceased to have any regard for the man. Yet, strange to
say, my life on board the Barbara was from that hour greatly
improved. I became unwittingly the hero of the crew, whose gibes
and jeers were turned to loving kindness, and just in proportion
to the heart tide flowing in on the poor sick stranger did it
ebb from Captain Patterson. They all saw my earnest desire to
become a sailor, and lamented with me the cruel sickness
standing in the way, and had I swallowed half the nostrums
proffered to kill it, and exploded in the trial, I am sure that
the crack would never have been laid to the charge of
spontaneity.
Even the carpenter manifested an anxiety in
my behalf, and declared that to cure seasickness there was
nothing equal to hot dough soused in treacle. The few days spent
in the Pool enabled me to recuperate a little, but the north
run, with a light ship and a heavy sea, soon brought me back to
a condition more deplorable than ever. I was so emaciated on my
return to Shields that my kind friends had to look twice to
recognize me. The kind commiseration I received would require an
abler pen than mine to describe. Even Mr. Walmsley expressed a
hope that the second trip would prove more conducive to my
comfort, and while he chid me for my rashness in leaping
overboard in a tide running three and a half knots, after a two
and sixpenny hat, he did not fail to censure the captain for his
severity. Thus fortified, I prepared to encounter the second
ordeal. On bidding good-by at home, I was agreeably surprised at
the manifestation of feeling on the part of a sweet girl of
sixteen years. She had, during the few days in port, prepared a
charm against the disease to which I appeared to be so prone.
This charm consisted of a neat silken bag, heart form,
containing odoriferous material, of which the smell of camphor
unfortunately predominated. This had to be placed with a silk
ribbon around the neck by the charmer's own hands, which I felt
was a most agreeable ceremony, although the remedy proved
entirely futile, and added to the list of my antipathies, which
the smell of camphor proves to be up to the present time.
Of affairs of the heart one labors under a
disadvantage in speaking in the first person. Thou canst say
with some degree of impunity, "He fell in love," but who ever
dared say, "I fell in love," without subjecting himself to the
ridicule of his fellow-susceptibles? This being a tale o' truth,
what can I do but confess?
To the cavilers at my inexperienced weakness
for that Northumbrian beauty, her heart teeming with the milk of
human kindness, and the bloom of health upon her cheek, I would
ask my dear reader, Did you ever have the good fortune to be so
favored? If not, in sorrow subdue your risibility and try
thinking.
The remainder of my time in the old Meal
Barrel will form the subject of another chapter, together with a
little experience in London.
I confess now to have had an intensified
motive to follow at that period a seafaring life. Not only on
account of the kind attentions of that young maiden, but the
delicate and disinterested kindness of her mother and every
member of the family. Indeed, I seemed to grow in the good
graces of that delightful family until I became as one of its
members. Little did I dream of the ordeal awaiting me in London.
It is well we know not what a day may bring forth.